Startled, Seoh turned his head and met Song Taejoon’s eyes, looking at him with an incredulous expression.

“……”

“……”

Seoh, who had been standing awkwardly, blinked several times before slowly straightening up.

What was this about? Looking at Taejoon, he didn’t seem to be in a state where he needed guiding. If he had truly lost his mind, he would have already rushed over by now. Not just stand there staring at him with that dumbfounded expression.

Could it be that he didn’t know Seoh was here and just happened to come by? Maybe he had been headed to the back yard and spotted him by chance? But that didn’t seem likely either, because… Song Taejoon was an S-rank Esper. Even if he didn’t know much, he knew that people like him could usually distinguish ordinary traces of presence. That made it even stranger.

“What are you doing here?”

What was he doing here? Seoh clenched his hands and tried to figure out what Taejoon meant by the question. Was it because he was in a place Taejoon usually went? Or because of why he was here at all?

As Seoh hesitated, not knowing what to say, Song Taejoon asked again.

“I asked what you’re doing here.”

Only then did Yoon Seoh have no choice but to answer.

“I was just resting for a bit.”

Did he look weird? Seoh rubbed his brow and nodded, and Song Taejoon’s expression shifted subtly, as if he couldn’t make sense of what he was hearing.

“I was going to the back yard, but it was cold.”

“……”

“And then… what brings you here?”

But it didn’t seem like something worth worrying about, because Song Taejoon turned away immediately.

“Come out to the living room.”

Seoh followed him carefully as Taejoon moved first. Just in case his neck or shoulders showed, he tugged his sleeves up and down to hide his palms. This should keep it out of sight, right? But what was Taejoon planning to say?

He followed with his head lowered and his nerves tight, until all of a sudden.

Grab.

He was startled by the large hand that caught the back of his hand. Seoh reflexively looked up, and when he saw Song Taejoon standing close, he sucked in a breath. Taejoon lifted a brow, looking surprised.

“You’re not guiding? It looked like you kept leaving it open all the time.”

Since that day, Seoh had been deliberately wrapping himself up tightly and carefully. He didn’t want guiding to happen by accident. And yet Taejoon had touched him so suddenly. Could he have been testing to see if Seoh had lied? His startled heart pounded hard.

If he thought about it, when Seoh had once rushed in to hug and kiss him however he wanted, Taejoon must have felt exactly like this. Shocked by something unexpected, forced into a guiding he hadn’t wanted, struggling to hold back his instincts. The more he thought about it, the more ashamed he felt of his own rudeness.

He made himself promise never to do that again, and then Song Taejoon made a strange request.

“Do it.”

“…Pardon?”

“Guiding.”

He wanted him to guide? Guiding? The guiding Song Taejoon hated?

Seoh stared at him, wondering if he had heard wrong. But Taejoon brushed past his confused gaze.

“You said you wouldn’t guide unless I wanted it.”

“I, I did… yes.”

“Then doesn’t that mean you’ll guide me whenever I want you to?”

That was true. When Taejoon wanted it, when he needed him whether he liked it or not, Seoh had agreed to do it. He just hadn’t expected Song Taejoon to ask while completely in his right mind.

He had never imagined a day like this would come, so all he could feel was dazed. He didn’t know what Taejoon was thinking, but for now it seemed better to do as he asked.

Seoh didn’t flood him all at once. Instead, he gently, slowly released his guiding energy. Then it began flowing into Song Taejoon. Taejoon flinched a little and quietly accepted the guiding.

The energy that had been so tangled and heavy before, too complicated to describe as it hovered right before rampage, now looked somewhat better than it had before. But it still wasn’t a point where he could relax.

Seoh released a little more energy and stroked the force that had clumped tightly together. The energy that had made him hurt felt incredibly soft as it flowed toward Song Taejoon. That, at least, was a relief.

As he guided Taejoon, the tingling at the tips of his fingers started to recede little by little. It was only a light touch, but because the matching rate was high, the amount of energy that transferred wasn’t bad at all. Taejoon looked stable too.

While guiding him, Seoh focused on Song Taejoon’s energy. He liked the feeling of it settling down bit by bit, so he tried to focus even more, but the warmth holding his hand suddenly disappeared. The guiding that had been in progress cut off cleanly.

“Ah…? It shouldn’t stop.”

The moment he instinctively thought he needed to catch the hand that was moving away, he abruptly came to his senses.

If Song Taejoon had let go, it meant he no longer needed guiding. There was absolutely no way he should continue on his own, and yet he had almost grabbed him as if he could. He had nearly caused a disaster. At least he had only slightly loosened his fingers without actually moving, so he was lucky.

Yoon Seoh quietly felt relieved after narrowly escaping that moment. He curled his sleeves back over his hands and drew both of them to his chest, then cautiously checked Song Taejoon’s reaction.

Taejoon looked at his own hand, flexing it open and closed several times. After repeating it a few times, he moved his eyes and looked at Seoh. The moment their gazes met, Yoon Seoh’s eyes ran away on their own, drifting to somewhere near Taejoon’s jaw.

“……”

Why wasn’t he saying anything? Had something felt strange?

Seoh waited for his reaction, but Taejoon stayed silent, so he looked up cautiously. Then he met a downward gaze. Compared to Taejoon’s expressionless face, the look in his eyes was almost persistent. It felt rather oppressive, so Seoh took a small step back.

“…Is that enough, n- now?”

Taejoon had let go first, so that was the end of it. Seoh took one more step back, trying not to give off a clingy feeling, and the gaze grew even heavier.

The eyes that had narrowed into thin slits were watching his actions closely, as if to see whether he would keep the line he had drawn, or whether he was just using it as an excuse to seduce him.

Of course Taejoon still couldn’t trust him. If it were him, he would have wondered what kind of scheme this was too. He didn’t know how much longer Taejoon would keep checking him, but he would respond to whatever he asked, whenever he asked, until Taejoon believed him.

That didn’t mean he was hoping for anything, or expecting a change. He just wanted their relationship not to go any worse than this. That wasn’t asking for too much, was it?

Seoh looked at the silent Song Taejoon for a long moment, then turned around first. Since Taejoon hadn’t grabbed him while he walked away, it seemed enough for today.

When Yoon Seoh opened the kitchen’s back door and returned to where he had been, he looked down at his things in the corner of the floor. One set of clothes, one pair of underwear, an emergency kit, and his phone. That was all. It really was a sparse little bundle.

Picking those things up, Seoh opened the door leading to the bathroom. Another narrow corridor, connected to the back of the house, appeared. Walking quietly, he set his things down at the end of it.

It didn’t matter that the location was different, because a hallway was a hallway. When he had been in the room, at least Taejoon hadn’t come in, but since it was a corridor, this was inconvenient. It would have been nice if there had been even a little hut out in the back yard.

When Seoh went out to the back yard, he looked around hopefully, but of course there was nothing like that. After confirming again that the space was empty, he laughed weakly.

Other than when he slept, it seemed he would have to stay in the back yard the whole time. He could only hope the weather wouldn’t get too cold.

Seoh squeezed himself onto the only chair he could comfortably use. Hugging his knees, he stared blankly at the sky. The blue was incredibly high, and the clouds were clear and white like cotton candy.

It was deep autumn.

✿ • ✿ • ✿

Song Taejoon sat on the sofa, lost in thought.

It had been a long time since he had received guiding because he himself had chosen to, rather than being forced into it while still in his right mind. The first time had been the day he manifested as an Esper, when his parents were still alive.

“……”

Both of them had been Espers, so the odds of him manifesting as one had been high too, but his parents had wanted him to live an ordinary life. They knew better than anyone how painful an Esper’s life was when tied to a Guide . But in the end, he manifested as an Esper, and worse, an S-rank one at that.

When he was a child and manifested as S-rank, he hadn’t understood how Espers actually lived. So he had simply been happy that he had become a strong Esper.

The first guiding partner he ever met was a nameless B-rank guide.

He had thought that, being S-rank, he would at least be paired with an A-rank guide, but they sent a B-rank for various reasons. He had thought it wasn’t the only day that mattered, so he hadn’t cared much at the time. His parents and a few other Espers had stiffened their faces, but the minor Esper receiving his first guiding was not in a position to know the rules of that world.

The guiding that began like that was done through light contact, with his parents and three bodyguard Espers present.

If you were going to receive guiding, you had to hold hands. When Song Taejoon had reached out with that simple thought and tried to take the Guide ‘s hand, the Guide had firmly swatted it away, then placed a hand carelessly on the back of his own hand and started the guiding. Before he could even understand what was happening, the strange feeling flowing through his body made him twitch and stiffen.

He had assumed guiding, which loosened clumped energy and made it stable, was naturally a good thing. Since it was like healing without pain or suffering, he had expected it to be warm and gentle.

But as if mocking a rookie Esper, the guiding energy gave off a lukewarm, unpleasant sensation and began loosening the tangled energy.

He still couldn’t forget the shock from that day. Even while feeling relief as a little of the energy loosened, it was strange that he couldn’t sense a trace of goodwill from the Guide who was loosening it. There was no way to describe it except strange.

It felt good, but not good. It brought relief, but at the same time it made him tense. That first guiding ended by leaving him with that shock.