ETR | Chapter 103

The statues of Qin Lou erected in the Sixteenth Heaven come in all shapes and sizes, none of which resemble him. It's perfectly normal for Qin Lou not to recognize them.

Xiao Xueman planned to tell Qin Lou about their past bit by bit. After all, they've been through so much. If he dumped it all on Qin Lou at once, it would probably feel like listening to someone else's story, with no sense of immersion.

Each of these heavens represents their most real experiences. Landing in the Seventeenth Heaven and going through it all again from a different perspective might actually be a good thing.

The place where Xiao Xueman is staying is the same Qingye City where he and Qin Lou once lived. They used to stay in a small village on the outskirts of the city. Qin Lou had endured a lot of grievances in that village, but it was where they first met.

"What's so strange about a memorial ceremony?" Xiao Xueman gently probed, trying to jog his memory. "Maybe the people here just really admire Wang Tian Dijun."

Qin Lou couldn't quite put his finger on it.

Qingye City, being a place where Qin Lou had actually lived, had the strongest atmosphere of personal worship for Wang Tian Dijun. Even though the Sixteenth Heaven is far from the First Heaven, nearly two hundred years have passed, and the news, however slow, has spread.

But this doesn't diminish his prestige in the Sixteenth Heaven at all.

Today isn't the anniversary of their disappearance, but Qingye City's memorial ceremony happens almost every month.

"I just feel it's a bit odd," Qin Lou explained. "The expressions on those people's faces are a bit too... over the top."

Watching your own memorial ceremony, of course, feels strange.

He couldn’t ignore the weird feeling in his heart, so he stood by the ceremony for a while.

Someone nearby enthusiastically started explaining Wang Tian Dijun’s life to him. It sounded impressive—how he ascended step by step from the Sixteenth Heaven and founded the first sect.

When it came to why such an amazing person died, the people of the Sixteenth Heaven generally didn’t accept the explanation of a failed breakthrough. That would make Wang Tian Dijun seem less capable than they boasted.

Instead, they accepted another explanation.

—Dying for love.

This explanation made Wang Tian Dijun seem deeply affectionate, so it was widely accepted in the Sixteenth Heaven.

After all, Xiao Xueman disappeared along with him. The idea of dying for love wasn’t something the Sixteenth Heaven imagined on its own; many in the First Heaven who knew the inside story thought so too.

In some ways, this explanation isn’t entirely wrong.

Though listening to people on the street narrate Wang Tian Dijun’s story felt like listening to a storyteller, Qin Lou felt a bit like he was slacking off. But when it came to the part about dying for love, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of emotion.

This inexplicable emotion startled him, and his first reaction was to find Xiao Xueman, so he left and returned.

Qin Lou had gone out to buy snacks for Xiao Xueman. Despite the strange and indescribable feelings from the street activities, he didn’t forget his purpose for going out.

He dutifully bought a box of golden crispy sugar for Xiao Xueman and presented it to him like a treasure.

Xiao Xueman picked one and put it in his mouth. The candy was crunchy, quickly melting into a sweet, sticky flavor.

Qin Lou asked, "Is it good?"

"A bit sweet," Xiao Xueman commented, "Want to try?"

Qin Lou ended up tasting the golden crispy sugar from Xiao Xueman's lips. It wasn't just a bit sweet; it was very sweet.

"Let's go," Xiao Xueman put away the candy to savor later, then pulled the dazed Qin Lou along, "I'll show you something."

At this moment, Qin Lou naturally followed whatever he said.

The original site of the small courtyard where they used to live had been turned into a lavish former residence of Wang Tian Dijun, so there wasn't much point in going there.

Xiao Xueman took him to the woods on the edge of Qingye City. Strictly speaking, that was where they first met. Qin Lou had been seriously injured over a piece of animal hide and wandered deep into the forest, unable to make it back. It was Xiao Xueman who found him.

The edge of the forest had changed long ago, with several generations of trees grown, but the deeper parts remained largely the same, with towering old trees and large stones covered in moss.

As Xiao Xueman led Qin Lou deeper into the forest, he felt an inexplicable sense of familiarity.

Until he saw those large stones.

A vague scene in his mind seemed to become clearer.

—Injured all over, despair and pain intertwined, feeling like he couldn't survive, possibly about to die there.

But at that moment, a pair of hands lifted him up, and he smelled the scent of grass and wood on that person, though he couldn't see their face clearly due to his own disheveled state.

Until he woke up again and saw those green eyes.

Exactly like the ones before him now.

"...Baby," Qin Lou tightly held Xiao Xueman's hand, "Did we meet before? Did you save me?"

Xiao Xueman smiled at him, full of joy, and said, "Finally remembered a bit?"

Qin Lou shook his head regretfully, "Only a little."

He wanted to see more of the Xiao Xueman in his memories.

"No rush," Xiao Xueman looked at him, his eyes bright, "This is at least a good start. There will be more chances in the future."

Qin Lou: "You looked good back then too."

He cherished the little scene he just recalled and couldn't help but share his true feelings with Xiao Xueman.

"If that was the first time I saw you, then I guess it was... love at first sight?" Qin Lou added.

In reality, it was love at first sight combined with love growing over time. The initial fondness deepened with each interaction, eventually becoming something he could never let go of.

Xiao Xueman chuckled softly, "When I first saw you, I felt the same way. I thought, this person is truly worth my effort."

He wasn't just saying pretty words to make Qin Lou happy; it was the truth. It's just that the earlier Xiao Xueman wouldn't have voiced such thoughts.

But back then, seeing Qin Lou, who was so much like himself, injured yet still struggling to survive, seeking a glimmer of hope.

Xiao Xueman immediately replaced the notion of fulfilling a promise to Loulan with the reality of a living, breathing person. He gradually confirmed that Qin Lou was indeed worth his efforts.

And it turned out, he never regretted what he did for Qin Lou, and in return, he received Qin Lou's precious, irreplaceable love.

How wonderful that after everything, they were still together.

At Qin Lou's current pace of advancement, they wouldn't be staying in the Sixteenth Heaven for long.

He continued to cultivate diligently, but after all, he and Xiao Xueman had their own lives. Cultivation wasn't more important than Xiao Xueman. Previously, Xiao Xueman had taken him to the depths of the forest and other places they had once visited.

Their stay here wasn't long, but the Sixteenth Heaven loved discussing Wang Tian Dijun and his legendary empress. Even in the inn, Qin Lou could hear many stories about himself.

Xiao Xueman was also trying to gradually help him accept the fact that he was Wang Tian Dijun.

Qin Lou himself was increasingly eager to regain his memory. Xiao Xueman's words made him feel that what he had forgotten was an important part of their relationship.

A few days later, Qin Lou asked him, "What do you think of Wang Tian Dijun?"

When he asked this, he was incredibly nervous.

Xiao Xueman knew he had probably guessed something and was seeking confirmation.

“Wang Tian Dijun was a very hardworking and impressive person,” Xiao Xueman said, seriously recalling. “Because he suffered a lot when he was young, he often appeared aloof, but inside, he was gentle. He was the best person I’ve ever known.”

This gentleness wasn’t just directed at Xiao Xueman.

Among the many pavilions in the Wangtian Immortal Gate’s inner sect, only three pavilion masters came from Xiao Xueman’s Yin Ying. Many other pavilion masters were cultivated by Qin Lou—his confidants.

Yin Ying mostly consisted of those Xiao Xueman had brought to the Wangtian Immortal Gate when they were young, who depended on him.

But Qin Lou’s relationship with his confidants was different. He was reserved, and it seemed like their relationship wasn’t that close, but they were loyal, capable, and action-oriented—much like Qin Lou himself.

Hearing Xiao Xueman praise someone, Qin Lou couldn’t help but feel a bit sour.

He had guessed a bit but hadn’t fully accepted that he was the legendary Wang Tian Dijun.

He wrapped his arms around Xiao Xueman's waist, looking a bit aggrieved, wanting his wife to comfort him.

Then he heard his beloved whisper in his ear, "...That's why I chose to be with him. Qin Lou, you've guessed it, haven't you? You are him."

Qin Lou, upon hearing this, suddenly confirmed something and then lowered his head.

"Why aren't you happy?" Xiao Xueman poked his cheek, "My Dijun?"

"I've heard stories about Wang Tian Dijun and the empress. They were separated," Qin Lou said. "Why did we separate?"

When he realized the possibility that he was Wang Tian Dijun, it was because he heard the empress's name was Xiao Xueman.

His first reaction was, why does this person's wife have the same name as mine? What a coincidence. Then he realized, what coincidence? That's my wife!

The dying-for-love part overlapped with what Xiao Xueman had told him about his memory loss. Qin Lou had indeed brushed past death's door. But besides that, he heard other things—before Wang Tian Dijun's accident, he and the empress had been apart for a long time.

Qin Lou couldn't accept this and couldn't imagine being separated from Xiao Xueman.

If he and Xiao Xueman had truly gone through all that, he could completely understand why he remembered nothing, yet Xiao Xueman was still etched into his bones.

Even in a state of amnesia, he loved this person so much he couldn’t bear to be apart for a moment.

How painful must it have been then?

“Being together is a rare thing, and it’s hard for everything to go smoothly,” Xiao Xueman said. “Qin Lou, we both had our reasons for that.

“Selfishly, I hope you remember the happy times we had, and as for the painful ones, if they’re forgotten, then let them be.

“I won’t leave you again.”

Qin Lou: "Then promise me."

"I promise," Xiao Xueman said. "I'll never leave again. I'll stay with you."

Only then did Qin Lou feel better.

His demands were always small, as long as Xiao Xueman was by his side.

Xiao Xueman also smiled with him. Now he deeply felt that starting over wasn't a bad thing. Although Qin Lou couldn't forget all the good and bad as he wished, love is like that, with both sour and sweet moments, and you have to accept them all.

At least he could take this opportunity to create more sweet moments, covering up the past ones. When Qin Lou eventually remembered, it wouldn't be as painful.